It is no secret that I love babies. In fact, I love them so much that I wouldn’t mind being pregnant with a 4th baby. But lately I started re-visiting my feelings as I feel baby kicks in my belly, as when I was pregnant. I quickly went online and Google and learned about phantom baby kicks. And still haven’t found a medical source for what causes it but it seems very common that women will experience the feeling of a baby kicking postpartum. They call it phantom baby kicks.
In my brain I know we are done having babies. I really enjoyed my first 2 pregnancies. With my third pregnancy I feel like I didn’t enjoy it as much. Partially because of the whole gender thing. Having 2 boys and everyone putting pressure on you on the sex of your baby, it just doesn’t make it enjoyable. Then the complications. I visited the ER probably 3 times with bleeding. One of them was a possible miscarriage. And then she was born 2 days after Christmas!!! Really? So I feel like if I had one more baby I could really enjoy what would be my last pregnancy.
There are many things that have affected me thinking about this. Some friends are pregnant. I just weaned the baby from the breast and 2 nights ago she finally slept the WHOLE night in her bed (her TODDLER bed!!!). Was not ready for everything to happen so quickly so yeah, I feel cheated with time. I need more time with my babies as BABIES. After all, I am finally working on my business and myself, but then if I wait a couple of years maybe my husband will be more inclined to have another baby?
So many questions and so many feelings. What if I never feel complete. I love pregnancy and I love carrying a child in my belly and I loved the childbirth experience. I just really loved it all so much that nothing about the process scares me. Not even toddlerhood. A lot of people ask me how I do it, and the truth is not that hard. I mean it’s exhausting, but not hard, I just really LOVE being a mom.
How did you know you were done? My husband says he’s done because we have the boys and we also have a girl so we have it all. How about you? Do you feel phantom baby kicks?
